There once was a soldier called Marty Wright
Who had a funny story to tell
He tried to march with his head held high
But he really didn’t do so well

He knew his left from right (“Yes, Sir!”)
He knew his stop from go
But whenever he tried it on parade
His body didn’t get the flow (“Oh, no!”)

Right boys! Listen here carefully
We need to get our drill first grade
Brigadier Partridge is coming to the Barracks
And we’re having a Brigade Parade

We have just two weeks to get this done
Arms straight! Turns sharp! Synchronised!
So we’ll keep on practising ‘til we get it right
Perfect with nothing compromised

Left, Left, Left-Right, Left
Time is short. We don’t have long
Private Wright - What are you doing?
You’re getting it wrong, wrong, wrong!

Left, Left, Left-Right, Left
Private Wright! Get off the square!
What am I going to do with you?
I’m losing all of my hair!

Our Marty was a pro with his rifle “Good shot!”
He was competent in ironing a shirt
He kept finishing his runs with a time “So fast!”
And he didn’t mind getting in the dirt

But some other soldiers felt jealous
They didn’t like the shine on Marty’s star
“We’ll cut that Marty right down to size
Make sure he doesn’t get too far”

“You obviously don’t know what you’re doing
You’re a loser and a joke!
Some dreams – they just do not come true
And yours are going up in smoke”

“You’ve been trying this marching for such a long time
It is just not meant to be
Don’t you think you should give up and try something else?
The Army’s not your destiny”

“Hey, Marty! Don’t listen to a word they say!
One day you’re going to be the best!
You might be down, but you are not out
Keep going ‘til you pass the test”

“You can turn your weakness into a strength
Marty, we believe in you
Every problem has a solution
And we’ll figure out what to do”

Those Bad Guy Bullies didn’t like Marty
They kicked him when he was down
They were nasty and mean, Yelling, “Get off the team!”
And then he started wearing a frown

Now poor old Marty felt so washed up
“I’m worried that I’ll lose my job”
He reached out for a rescue plan
Crying, “Help me, Sergeant Bob!”

Now, Sergeant Bob said, “You are a great big
Asset to the Company
But we can’t just keep you off parade
You are in the Army!

I’m sending you to a dancing school
So they can sort you out
They’ll set you a program of your own
And show you what marching is about”

Our Marty took a tram right into town
To the Brisbane Dancing School
He saw all the students strutting their stuff
And felt like such a fool

“Hello there!” called dear Mrs. Jones
Come in, my son, come in!
Now don’t be shy. Just give it a try
Everyone’s nervous when they begin”

So, Mrs. Jones gave him a marching test
And asked, “What is this mess?”
Marty said, “Well, my name is Wright
But I have to go left, right, left!”

“I see your problem, I understand
Your steps are not in sync
You need a lesson in rhythm and groove
It’s easier than you think”

Now, Carol was a dance extraordinaire
She said, “Marty, I like your smile
I’ll volunteer to come to class
And help you with your style”

“I think you are a Late Bloomer
Going at a slow and steady pace
Just remember it was the tortoise
Not the hare that won the race”

If you learn how to dance, you will know how to march
Let’s start with some Jazz and Swing
Just take my hand and hold onto me
I’ll teach you everything

Rock back with your Left, Rock forward with your Right
With your Left foot - Slide, Close, Slide
With your Right foot - repeat this triple step
And feel your two feet glide

Rock back with my Left, Rock forward with my Right
With my Left foot - Slide, Close, Slide
With my Right foot - repeat this triple step
And feel my two feet glide

Left, Right, Left, Right
Left, Right, Left, Right
Left-Right, Left-Right, Left-Right, Left-Right
Left-Right, Left-Right, Left

Dum spiro spero
Keep following your dreams
Your situation is not impossible
Or as tricky as it seems

When some people claim that you’re not good enough
They turn their backs and walk away
Reach out and you will find some who
Will believe in you and stay

So, Carol gave Marty her wise, wise words
And her optimistic stance
She gave him a home-made encouragement card
To cultivate some romance

But Marty did not get the hint
He was not even warm
But he knew when Carol showed up one day
In an Army uniform

Our Marty was no longer embarrassed and down
With his clumsy two left feet
‘Cause a little bit of swing from the Big Band King
Helped him to find the beat

“1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and
Rum tum tum-a tum tum
I’ve got the rhythm, I’ve got my groove
Keep my left foot with the Bass Drum!”

Now, Marty embraced his new routine
He kept practising day and night
And within two weeks he had it down pat
He mastered his left, And he mastered his right

“I’m back! Hey fellas, and look at me!
It’s great! Oh what a thrill!
Just call me ‘Private Left Wright Left’
‘Cause I can do my drill!”

So, the Army had its Brigade Parade
With the big Brigade’s Brigadier
And when Marty aced his marching pace
The crowd raised a happy cheer

Carol and the girls were there to see
What her new boyfriend could do
They met Marty’s mates at the Morning Tea
Saying, “Hi boys. Nice to meet you!”

Now, Sergeant Bob breathed a big sigh of relief
Marty’s friends yelled, “Good on you, Mate!”
Then Mrs. Jones gave him a sloppy kiss
And Carol took him on a date

When the Bad Guy Bullies saw Marty’s success
“Whatever!” “Who cares?” “So what!”
Their sabotage efforts didn’t go to plan
“Comeuppance is all they got!”

Copyright © 2000 Makayla Ryan, Blue Vibes Music

Lyrics Ownership – 100.00% Makayla Ryan, Blue Vibes Music

Music Ownership – 100.00% Makayla Ryan, Blue Vibes Music